If you have any type of goal that has not yet manifested for you in reality, you are in the process of switching identities and transforming from who you are now into who you want to be. Embodying this new identity involves adopting new habits, thinking and feeling differently, and even surrounding yourself with different people.
Any time you are in the process of conscious creation and shifting your experience of yourself in the world, your identity needs to expand as you grow. So today, I want to talk about how to fight for the experience you are trying to manifest.
Join me on the podcast this week to discover how to fight for the identity that you are trying to create. I’m sharing why focusing on our identity is so important as we grow in this world, how to get clear on what this shift will require of you, and why it’s never too late to make an intentional decision and step into a new identity.
You are listening to episode 12 of the Wealthy Happy Soul Podcast: What’s Your Name?
Welcome to The Wealthy Happy Soul Podcast, a show for high achievers who are ready to start enjoying the life they’ve worked so hard to create. Join me, your host and certified life coach Dr. Tangie, to learn how to start infusing the dedication you have for your career into living a truly fulfilling life. If you’re ready to finally gain the happiness your soul has been longing for, this podcast is for you.
Hello everybody. I am so happy you are here. Welcome to episode 12. I first want to start off offering a big congratulations to HL888 because she is the latest winner of the $100 gift card giveaway. Way back in September she left me a review and she said, “Enjoyed this podcast. I really enjoy listening to the Wealthy Happy Soul podcast. I learned helpful tips and felt inspired.” And I just want to say thank you for that review. Thank you for screenshotting it and sending it to me. And now you are $100 richer, happy holidays.
I was so excited when I drew her name because I am obsessed with numbers. And the end of her user name has the numbers 888. And that is one of my favorite numbers in the world. Energetically it is the number for abundance. And it just happened to attract one of the $100 gift cards that I’m giving away to celebrate the launch of this podcast. So, congratulations to HL888. I will be in touch with you shortly by email.
And just a reminder so you don’t miss out on the giveaway I’m doing. I still have three $100 gift cards left. And all you have to do in order to be entered to win one of them is to leave me a review on this podcast on iTunes. And then please screenshot your review and email it to me at firstname.lastname@example.org. Otherwise I won’t be able to enter you to win one of the three gift cards that I have left, because iTunes or any of the other platforms do not give me a way to contact you when you leave a review.
And of course this goes for everybody else who has already left a review as well. If you haven’t, send it to me by email, email@example.com, you won’t be entered, so please remember to go back, screenshot it, send me a quick email and you may be $100 richer too.
So today I would like to talk about identity and how to fight for the identity you are trying to create for yourself. And really we’re all doing this because I believe that if you have any type of goal that has not manifested for you in this reality; you are in the process of switching identity. Meaning, if you have a goal of being a six figure entrepreneur, the identity version of the person that has that is very different from your current identity.
For example, if you are currently an engineer who makes $80,000 a year or you’re working for somebody else, that identity is very different. So much of your work will be in the transformation of your identity. Identity meaning what does someone do with their time? How do they feel? How do they think? Who do they surround themselves with? How do they speak? And it works like this with any goal because the person who sets the goal has a different identity make-up and way of being than the person who actually achieves the goal, who actually lives the goal on a day-to-day basis.
So any time you are in the process of conscious creation and shifting your experience of yourself in the world you have to expand your sense of identity.
I recently just got back from visiting one of my very best friends in DC. And when we both left Chicago we were both single women. However, she had a very strong intention of creating a family when we left. And within a year and a half she became both a wife and a mother, which required her to expand her sense of identity to include her now wonderful husband and her precious daughter. She is a different identity now that if she were to try to switch back to being single, her single identity couldn’t even contain or sustain what she’s created and vice versa.
So if you’re listening to my podcast I already know that you are on the quest to make an identity shift. And just as if you had taken on a new last name after marriage, you also need to learn to take on the new identity that you are in the process of creating and expressing. So who is that future version of yourself? Write it down. What does she have that you do not? How does she think differently than you do? How does she feel on a daily basis that is different than you? How does she act different? Maybe she even dresses differently or decorates her space differently.
Keep in mind this is also you, it’s just a different version of you. I like to think about it this way, the third grade version of myself loved to play with Barbies. However, today’s version of myself doesn’t really play with Barbies very much. And it’s not that there’s anything wrong with Barbies, it’s just that the identity that I’m expressing today just doesn’t play with Barbies.
And likewise, the identity that you are in the process of expressing does things differently than how you do them today. Your toys may become different. The things you talk about and speak about may become different. Who you go to brunch with on Sundays may become different. And thinking about who you’re in the process of becoming will strengthen the connections between your mind, your body and your behaviors. And also this is a way for you to get a better handle of where you are in life as well as where you’re headed.
So writing these things down and actually practicing them. Practicing feeling and thinking like this person on a daily basis is what begins to solidify her or him. I know I’m saying her a lot but this applies to men too. But it actually begins to solidify her in this reality as opposed to only in your imagination. And every day you will become this person more and more, you will become this new identity more and more. And this will play a very important role in the decisions that you’re actually making on a daily basis as well as in things that I mentioned before, like the company you choose to keep.
And I think I’ve repeated this several times because much of who you are today can actually be attributed to the people that you currently most closely affiliate with. Your friends today probably share interests in the same kind of things that you also find fascinating, whether that’s fine dining, or going to the spa, or working out, or being more knowledgeable in your spirituality, or your personal growth. Maybe it’s luxury travel, or even entrepreneurship.
So when thinking about the new identity you are creating for yourself, always question whether or not you have people around you who support where you are trying to go. Do they believe in the new you? Or at the very least, do they respect what you’re trying to bring forth in your life? Because not everybody will, and when people challenge you, you have to be willing to fight for and defend your future self.
I am from Louisville, Kentucky, and Muhammad Ali is a home town hero, not just of mine but probably of everybody who has ever hailed from Louisville, Kentucky. And just the other day I came across a documentary on YouTube and it was called What’s My Name? and it featured Muhammad Ali.
And one part of the documentary highlighted the time around him going through the process of changing his actual name and identity from his birth name of Cassius Clay to Muhammad Ali. And what I found fascinating was that he demanded that people acknowledge his new identity to the point where during a fight with this other boxer, and forgive me, I’m not sport savvy so I can’t remember this gentleman’s name.
But this boxer was refusing to acknowledge his new name and his new identity, and there was this pre fight interview. And Muhammad Ali was like, “You’re going to say my name or I’m going to beat it out of you.” And it was really intense. And it was interesting to watch, that that’s kind of what he did. He won the fight and every time he threw a punch he would yell at this gentleman, “What’s my name? You’re going to say my name.”
And I thought to myself, wow, that’s one way to fight for your identity because here’s what happens. And this isn’t only with strangers, but it’s especially with people who are close to you that you personally know. Other people tend to get really anxious when you start to change. It’s usually not because they don’t want the best for you, or that they are consciously wishing you ill will. What’s really happening is that their experience of you is a pattern.
So if you have a long term friend or a family member and their experience of you for the last 10 years is that you guys meet for tacos or margaritas every Friday night after work, they are going to feel a bit fearful and anxious the moment you announce that you’ve given up alcohol and tacos forever. Because their pattern of you is now interrupted and their security and the consistency of what your relationship has become is threatened.
So they may react with, “Yeah, right, I know you, come on.” Or something like, “I’m not sure anybody can give up tacos and margaritas forever, are you okay? I’ve never seen that done before.” But remember, just because they’ve never seen it doesn’t mean it isn’t possible. And just because they react to you from their own fear and their insecurity around what your relationship will become, it doesn’t mean you have to believe them and sacrifice what you really want for a life that you just end up settling for because of other people.
So how is it that you stand up and fight for the new identity you are creating without literally having to punch people in the face like Muhammad Ali did? Well, the first thing you do is you realize that this is your story and you are the author. You don’t have to stay in any story that you don’t like. We all know that where you’re raised, and who you grow up with, and the experiences you have as you mature from an infant all the way to an adult, we know they’re powerful factors affecting your development and affecting your core identity.
However, your history doesn’t have to be the end of the story when it comes to your present identity. One of the most encouraging things about life to me is that you can change who you are at any given moment. You could do it at 22, you could do it at 37, you could do it at 64, you could do it at 93. You are the author. You can change whatever you want to change at any given time.
And the second thing I think is important for everyone to do is to curate your environment. Think of your life like an art gallery, or a showroom. Or you know how when people go to sell a house, they stage a home? And they fill it with pretty furniture and art, and they place things strategically. Then you can do the same thing with your life, with the people you hang around with, with the clothes you wear, with the places you choose to spend your time, with what you spend your money on. You can curate your own environment to match the identity that you are trying to create.
And lastly, adhere to the model of conscious creation which I described in detail in episode two. And understand that the only person who determines your identity is you. It doesn’t matter if other people don’t believe in what you are trying to do. You don’t need them to. The only thing that matters is if you decide to listen and take on the beliefs of others as your own.
If you choose to be ruled by external validation versus your own God given creative power, your own sovereignty, realize that what you believe to be true about yourself is a very powerful force in determining your personal identity. What you feel, think, and believe about yourself are major aspects of your overall identity. Realize that you have considerable power to influence the type of identity you possess and show to others.
You get to choose, just like Muhammad Ali who when he no longer identified with his birth name of Cassius Clay, changed his actual name and stepped into his new identity as the greatest. Just like Beyoncé, who let us know she was Sasha Fierce.
I am Dr. Tangie, what’s your name? Have a great week.
Thank you for listening to The Wealthy Happy Soul Podcast. If you want to dive deeper into alignment and start cultivating your inner wealth, head on over to drtangie.com.